“If you were me, could you defend the given rights to all of man?”
i worked hard for my birth plan. from all paragraphs, then in point forms, a check list, then how disappointed i was that Dr. K refused to even look through my birth plan (instead she suggested me to give it to ANY doctor available during the birth of my baby), i want to give, by far, the simplest version of the birth plan i could write.
i do not want to be discarded as another faceless mother-to-be that they had to grudgingly attend.
again, i am not hoping that they will follow it to the T, as that would only be a wishful thinking and they would just say “but…we are a government hospital!”, i would not give up hope.
i bet there are at least ONE wise and experienced doctor in HSB who have heard that there is an existence of such thing, and he/she could be understanding enough to at least accommodate to some of the requests.
or else, in this short span of time, we are thinking of changing to another hospital as i might been seen as a nuisance and difficult just because i have opinions and not just being submissive.
a birth is supposed to be an enjoyable moment and not to be feared of.
and these past few weeks, my pubic bone hurts like hell. can;t even toss and turn as much as i like. everytime i turn, there this “klik” sound on my my lower back. no, not that kind of the ‘krruup’ relieving sound it makes. climbing stairs is extra difficult, let alone got up and get inside the car.
looking about my symptoms. some said it’s normal (any ‘pain’ is normal la now?).
but one caught my eye: symphysis pubis dysfunction or SPD.
and the symptoms match, 99% to the T.
the most detail about SPD i could find (yes, i am plus size, someone even think i got a ‘busung’.)
i did fell down the stairs and hurt my tail bone few months ago and i am still recovering.
pleaded with the ob-gyn through my birth plan that is seen ‘unusual’ in a govt hospital that i can’t do lithotomy, like this one:
because i sure hell did try on my own, and fuck, i can’t even squat because of my tail bone hurting.
with SPD, the position is not even recommended. but noooo, dr. k said ‘that is the only position available at hsb’.
i did vacuum and clean my house extra lot during my pregnancy. because i feel it is extra messy and it pisses me off.
and i push my own shopping cart…because bringing a basket wouldn’t make sense if you have tons of groceries now, would it?
i am torn between getting massively bored by resting at home, or walk around so i can give birth easy.